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Brutal Assault part 1

posted by worm 05-09-2006, 16:16

I've decided to tell you how I and three of my friends enjoyed the summer's best music festival - Brutal Assault. It took place in the Czech Republic therefore we departed earlier so that we would have enough time to get there in time and pitch our tents.

The trip had an unexpected milestone... a finely moustached lithuanian border-guard brought us interesting news - the one person of the four of us (me, madball, Dr. Pain and Ms. Death) had to have a birth certificate. It appeared that notarial certification of the parents' permission wasn't enough for people under 18 to go abroad. So we had to turn back to Riga - approximately 100 kilometres. So we left our hometown at 7:00 PM instead of the planned 2:00 PM, though later our timing appeared to be perfect. When we returned back to the border we hoped that there would be another border-guard without a mustache because we had some jokes planned about the missing moustache, but we stumbled upon the same statesque and respectably moustached border-guard. After he had a glimpse at our documents, he turned them back, chuckled and said something like that "You could've got off with a bottle *a warm-hearted moustached smile* drove such a long way...". We continued our journey a little bit perplexed, but having driven such extra distance, we consoled ourselves that the stupid bribable border-guard was left without a booze and now had to water his moustache with some local alcohol and spend his own money for it.

The only impressions of Lithuania were interesting names of the populated areas - Azhuolju Buuda and Kazhlju Ruuda. If you're born in an english speaking country, you probably cannot even pronounce these ones. Come to think of it, probably if you're from anyplace that's not Lithuania, you'll have significant difficulties pronouncing words in their language. When we reached the Lithuanian-Polish border there was a huge line of trucks, more than a hundred of them I think. We later found out that on this border they caught the 4 escaped latvian prisones. They were climbing over a fence when they got caught. Unlucky. What concerns the trucks, they were scanned or something.

The only problem we had in Poland was to get through Warsaw, which is the only capital in Europe that doesn't have a detour road around it. For some reason none of us liked being in Poland, it just... I don't know, it isn't an attractive country. I could probably say whatever I want about them them as much as I would like, because I haven't found a Pole that speaks english (I wasn't looking? Hey, how about Slipknot on a concert in Poland shouting "Raise your middle FINGERS" when the poles just elevated their fists and shouted "AAAARRR"?). Anyway, because we were (and are) smart we found our way through Warsaw quickly and after ~6 hours we entered the Czech Republic. This country looked totally different - a lot of small villages, fine roads (gotta hand it to Poland, their roads were ok, too) and a nice view at the surrounding mountains. When we weren't very far from the point where the festival took place, we decided to find a place to exchange money. We found a HIPERMARKET in a small city and we went in.

When I approached the woman that worked there and had "INFORMATION" written above her and asked "Can I exchange euros?" she got confused a bit, then took her phone and told something to the person at the other end. I could hear something about english people and I thought, that it's quite a good idea - she'll call in some expert in english and we'll have no problem communicating. After a while a man approached us, who's step expressed self-assurance and a lively mood. I addressed him with the same question as the woman before and I got an immediate answer "Cash, no problem" which was supplemented with such dynamic gesticulation that it seemed that everything is ok, because the man was all smiles. After we "talked" a bit I turned to my friends with a dawning smile - hey, the dude is smiling, saying "No problem", everything's fine. But my friends apparently had heard something else and explained to me that we were allowed to buy stuff here with euros but were not able to exchange them. A little puzzle-headed I turned back, decided that I want to make sure and asked the same question appending words "to krones" at the end of it. To make better contact I even gestured and grimaced a bit. That provided the necessary results and I got "No" as an answer, which was supplemented with more gestures. Luckily, this guy not only understood the next question "Can you show us where we can exchange euros?" but hurried to show us the right direction. Unluckily it seemed that he doesn't have an excellent knowledge of english, so the only guidelines he could provide was the words "left" and "hotel", which didn't ring a lot of bells to me. But Dr. Pain seemed to have understood something, so we drove our car to the direction pointed by the helpful english man. Consequently we turned up at a small hotel, where quite a sympathetic girl was eating a soup. Having noticed a small board with the exchange rate on it I somewhat depressed asked the girl about the money exchange with a slender hope that she would understand something. To my genuine surprise she not only answered but did it in comprehensible english, explaining that she cannot exchange the money, while she can show us the way to the exchange point. I was ready to marry this girl. We arrived at the exchange point and after a while a girl opened the door for us from the inside chuckling about our two previous attempts to open the door and our faulty conclusion that the place was closed. So finally the money was exchanged - the journey could carry on.

To be continued
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